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I wasn't born with wings, so I'm trying to make my own
 
Sunday, January 05, 2003  

I never thought I'd hear these words come out of my mouth but... I'm tired of spending money!!!!! In the past week I have spent more money than I have in the past month, and that's including all the Christmas shopping I did! We've been to the grocery store three times in the past weeks, once for cleaning supplies ($100 on cleaning supplies :-O and twice for food and basics like saran wrap. Then there was the trip to the drug store for the basics like bandaids, tylenol, etc that was another dent in the pocketbook. Then there's our new down comforter and the cherry on top of the sundae today was $150 in computer parts so we can network our two computers together! AAAAAHHHHHH! My plastic is smoking! We have the money, but just barely at this point. This is crazy. And there's so much more I want to do to spiff up our apartment. Just for the bedroom I have the longest list. Some are simple, some aren't. Here's my bedroom decorating wish list, in order of expense :-) (aka which will be done first!)

1. Garbage can (this is neccessary, I'll probably get it this week)
2. Rug to go next to the bed (because hardwood is cold when you first get up)
3. Wallpaper border to get some color on the walls
4. "Scarf" type drapes in blue to accent the white drapes
5. Headboard
6. Footboard
7. New chest of drawers for Mark ('cause his is just butt ugly and abused!)

Here are pics of our bedroom before decorating:


And here's after:


So, it's come a long way, but there are still some finishing touches I'd like to put on it. And my list is longer for the other rooms! But, I am lucky that I made some nice stuff to put around our place. I did a lot of weaving while I was still in school and had access to the school looms. Here are pics of a mugrug from a set I made for the livingroom and a placemat from a set I wove:



The only room that I consider completely finished is the bathrooom. I wouldn't mind a couple of extra towels, and I'm looking for a cute basket to keep my make-up in, but it's decorated nicely. I love our shower curtain! It's all happy and dotty. Speaking of my bathroom, I have to go home and clean it! Wah! The joys of having my own place :-) Actually, it's still pretty clean, so I'll probably put it off for a couple days. I have to go back to work tomorrow, so I want to spend some time relaxing tonight, and mentally preparing myself for my return. I don't know why, but I'm actually pretty nervous about returning to work. I've only been working there and I've been gone for two weeks now for the holidays and the move. What if they decided that they don't need me anymore? And now I'm out in my apartment and I'll be poor and won't be able to pay the rent and then I'll be living on the street! (Yes, unfortunately my mind really does work this way. They'll still need me, I'll have a job, and even if I don't Mark can keep us afloat until I find another job, and if he can't my parents will help us, and if they can't help us, they'll at least let me move back in. But I have this mind that goes to the worst possible scenario and then I obsess about it until I'm in tears knowing that I'm now homeless, when I'm sitting in a warm apartment with two months' worth of bill paying money in the bank. I really hate how I do this to myself and I'm trying to find ways to stop it, but so far I haven't been very successful. The best solution so far has been to divulge this all to a loved on in a tearful rant and then I feel a little better. I feel so bad for my mom and Mark when this happens, but they're pretty used to it by now. I'm so lucky to have people who love me in spite of this little personality flaw. It takes a special person to love someone as crazy as me!

Anyway, onto some more fiber news. The sock is progressing very nicely, I'm more than halfway to the ankle. I'm only making a short ribbed cuff, I don't like wearing socks in the first place, but my feet have been so cold lately, I decided to make myself some socks, but I'm compromising by making them short. That will be the most comfortable for me. But I am loving knitting socks! I wasn't sure I'd like it, but I wanted to try to see, and I love knitting socks! I've been learning so much from knitting these things! I feel like I invented socks, I'm so happy with these things! I even fixed a drop stitch all by myself without tearing back. This is a big accomplishment for me, believe it or not. I just really feel like I'm learning a lot about knitting just from this sock! Here's my progress on it so far:


I just feel like the cat's pajama's. My next project is going to be my very first sweater! I got the pattern off of Lion Brand's web page and I got a bunch of Homespun on sale last week at Hobby Lobby. I also got enough to make three scarves and matching hats for a homeless shelter. I decided it's time I gave back because I have been so blessed. I can't afford to give much money right now, so I'll have to give my time and I figured I might as well enjoy it, so I'll be knitting for charity. It makes me feel like I'm giving part of myself, which in my opinion is better than money anyway. I know some charities may not feel that way, they may prefer the money, but I'm doing what I can for now. I hope everyone is having a great first week of 2003 and hopefully I'll be blogging more soon as I'll have a computer at the apartment (at least within the next week!)

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